You know I born deaf since toddler. No fever. No deaf generation. Nothing, just normal. I know my family has disabled generation. My parents did not notice me being deaf till I was about a year old. I was so active, and sounds did not bother me. The doctor found out that I am deaf by feeling the vibrate on his desk and told my parents.

At the first time, I went to vocational rehibition in Alabama. They took tested my audiology and see how much deaf I am. They told us that my left ear is hard of hearing and right ear is deaf.

As kid, I never notice on my hearing issues because I was so attention by face to face because I have to read the lips. I never think of my hearing so who cares. You know I am very active and cannot sit one place. I loved to be playing so they decide to play with me with therapy lessons. Speech and listening. I never listening so I kept look away all the time and find something to do.

I did not learn ASL/SEE till I was 5 years old with my mom. Only I know the home signs with family and friends. When sign language comes up and get my real attention. I still not listening, even wore hearing aids. All I think hearing aids is just hearing SOUNDS like door rang, phone rings, screaming or train passing. That I would listen to.

Yes, back to my mom’s womb, we (mom and me) listen to jukebox. I always stick to record album desk to listen all albums but REAL listening? Nope. Remember I am AHAD as kid. I did not attention to it, just feel the vibrate the music. It’s made me feel relaxing. Right now? I only use the radio when I was driving. I would allow music freedom at home when I wear the hearing aids. One day, I would demand to have record album desk. LOL.

All the years, with audiologist. My mom or dad would tell them how much deaf I am when I was kid. As adult, I have told them how much deaf I am. They can focus on my left ear first before use my right ear. The famous audiology building box, I LOVED it. LOL. On headphone, I listened on my left ear. They can voice and reported her on words that I would understand clearly. Not much words I would understand. My right ear silences. Next, they wanted me to hear some of high, middle, or low frequencies on my left ear. I raise my hand. Then use my right ear, raise my hand. Both, same thing. They asked words on my right ear and heard like confused, unstable, or rattled. I cannot understand those words. They took the headphone to bone conduction headphone. Test on my right ear, not hear anything but felt vibrate on behind my left ear. They took bone conduction headphone off.

Okay, you read above. All the years, I never think of learning to listen to any words on my left hearing because I never attention to it. When first time wear hearing aids and never think of anything but noises outside or inside in house. I know I always depend on my left than my right because of hard of hearing. Also, I ignore the important thing in my life is listening to words. I knew I am deaf period.

Back in Texas, elementary school in hearing class. I was writing for spelling test in the class. The teacher stated the word, we write to spell it out (you know spelling bees). First time I heard the word without look at the sign language interpreter. I was so confused and shocked at the same time. I looked at my HOH friend behind me. “What?”, I asked myself. I was so afraid and not understand what I hear. I decide to keep shut my mouth till learning some more about hearing words.

I kept picking the words like couple or three words in a year. I did not practice hears the words because not use it all the time. I been pay attention to face by face all the time, not have hearing aids wear all the time. Even I was in speech therapy and hears the words but still ignore them. As adult, at audiology and notice them differently because of testing on my ears. My right ear is deaf but not stable with noisy or understand the words. My left ear does.

When I had hearing aids wearing and can tell that it does running across over my head. Many people I met who are deaf like me, wear hearing aid on one side and cannot feel the vibrate. Few people I met who are deaf and HOH like me, wear hearing aid can hear across over the head and can feel vibrate. I knew deaf and HOH does not wear hearing aids because of tired of so much noisy, batteries changes in each 10 days, and stressed.

Hearing aids are STRESSED! Whoa! My dad lost his hearing due of his old age. He wore all the time. Me? Not wear them all the time. I would need them when I am at conference, being with hearing friends or working. I need to hear it because I do not want to look fool if I walk away without hearing aids on. I should wear like my dad’s because I wanted to listen music all the time! LOL.

Later ~DW