Author Archives: deafwriter

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About deafwriter

I am Deaf and love to write anything relate to what I seen. I love to tell about deaf point of view, what people's mind think, and million to say! Also, I am easy to hang with.

Not that mistakes.

Okay let’s say this. I know that subject is very mystery but fact. Not that mistakes take people suspense with anyone who been very aware about risks or courageous. I been there but few times funny but other times not funny. It is really interest and serious events. Let’s go.

You know I am deaf writer here and has been there in different situations in events when I grow up. Deaf has courageous on facing people and stand up for those advocate on deaf laws. Me? I am not really political myself but see lot of those different issues. I am not that courageous enough but admit I do when I had guts. HA.

Please, not talk about political.

I am very active child and still do in adulthood. When my mom noticed me watching television of Olympics or sports channels. I always told her “I WANT DO THAT” She know I am sport person so my dad too. She isn’t sport person but she does some drills at high school. My aunt (mom’s sister) is sport person like me.

Okay, back to this. She took me to swimming lessons and drop me off. Couple of swimming instructors looked at me because I am deaf and innocent kid. I was so trilled to swim and they were nervous to teach me. They not sure how to teach deaf kids or adult to do. I always followed kids what to do and become friends quickly. Then later on, drop me off to softball practice and game without sign language interpreter! The coaches has been communicates with me and followed other players. Of course, I never understand rules or instructions when I was kid. I understand the active happens so rules are alike as instructions. I played softball leagues for many years. I took dance class and gymnastic lessons without sign language interpreter. Those instructors make movements and show how to do this or that. I been followed others too. Unfortunately, not good friends with them because they think I am sloppy on dance or gymnastic. Well, I do LOVE to dance to anything (Taps, Modern or Jazz) and LOVE to hang on (uneven bars, balance and vault).

That comes to me when I am taking Pilates classes and boom I am Deaf! Those instructors freaking out and I was just like normal person who like to do something alike others but sign language requires? Not need that, just do it like others. I always send myself unexpected into Pilates or filming without them knowing I am deaf.

Hospital or doctors would be fuss at me because I never ask for sign language interpreter so I have to practice to ask for! Bad habit! I always come up like BOOM here I am!

Here I AM! ~ DW

Deaf and LGBTQIA able to act?

First at all, I know there is many people who can act on stage or on set. I seen disability roles out there and tried to reach them but not able to act. Few will take the roles. Few is reality actors who is not disability but willing to play for the role which is good income. Why no disability people NOT take the role if you think you are deserves to play for? Few reality actors who is not LGBTQIA but straight and plus willing to play for the role, too. Lot of LGBTQIA not want to take the role for filming or theater, only few does. Do you think you want that deserves?

I wrote one chapter about acting part back in my published book, DEAF FACES WORLD. I was study as actor and filming behind the camera. I seen lot of issues and can understand director always want MATCH and FIT the role. That is why casting director have to follow their favor and the producer has to agree with both. The producer is responsible to make pay and set up for. Yes I worked with production crew and knew about all this. I was also background actor. I worked with one of film about deaf and transgender couple. I learned about it and make announcement in my Facebook page. I got few response from deaf actors and no response from transgender actors. I mean NOTHING from LGBTQIA actors! Anyway, few deaf actors all are from EAST states and not able to make to come unless paying for their trip. Our film is low budget and not able to pay those actors for trip. My director found one actress who is hearing and use ASL flexible. Also he found one actor is NOT transgender and willing to play one. Director get call to invite one of my friends who is deaf actor. He was so exciting and ready to break the ice. The director did not tell him that I am working with him so deaf friend was surprised to see me there. he had ASL interpreter with him and not understand what is going on. I have to explain to him and he disagreed with the director and me. ASL interpreter left him alone with me and is not certificated so not allow that. We worked for over the weekend. Actors did good job.

Well, not many deaf actors or LGBTQIA actors around that accepts the roles. Why not? If they want to try out and do it. The casting director will react out with you and you never know! The director shows the role that description what they wanted then grab it. Not wait on right role for you. Look at me, I am deaf and non speaking actor, always grab any roles I felt FIT and MATCH for. I don’t care if I am straight or hearing. It can changing anything like one of my film with director that work with was so amused and thankfully.

If director doesn’t find anyone then can lost the film. My director did wonderful job to keep his films are up and running. He won’t give up. Lot of directors become frustrated and gave up quickly. Of course, films is expensive to making and some are low budget and high budget films. One film I was on set as archaeologists and the film is low budget and becomes high budget. That is one I am proud of and knowledge all films are not always are high budget. If you are in New York, Los Angeles or Toronto then they are high budget films. If you are in well known cities like St Louis, Dallas or Seattle then they are able low to high budget films. Mostly time all cities are low budget films. That is difficult for actors to react for any roles? You want try Bollywood films, Independent films or Foreign films? They are good roles and better production crews you can find.

Remember director always look for anyone who is FIT and MATCH the role. They did not care about your race, disability or sex. No matter you think good role and felt fit then GO FOR IT!!!!!

If you think deaf and LGBTQIA actors can do it then GO FOR IT! Don’t wait for right role or you LOSS.

(deaf actor is not invite again so hope there is more DEAF, DISABILITY or LGBTQIA actors who able to act for DEAF, DISABILITY or LGBTQIA roles.)

~DW

Deaf faces with MASK or non MASK

We are aware to wear those face masks to keep safety and healthy. Keep 6 feet apart in social distancing and wash hands each time touched.

One thing is come up and actually off from our deaf community is NOT wear face MASK?!? Time out. Look, we are very same common as people are. They would wear mask or not. Well it is up to them, their decides. They had same feeling as general people. Both has same common sense and wear it. Both could have decide to not wear it. Anyone’s opinion like those beaches going, strikers or party heads. Up to them and not our problem.

Reason I am say this is because people told that deaf should not wear face masks because of can’t read lips. Yes, we can not read your lips but we can wear face masks. Why they think we not need masks? I not think it is good idea because of scary virus running whole the time!

When I am at work and people had masks on and talk to me like I am idiots. Yes that is true. It was so frustrate for me because they won’t let mask off to read their lips. Only way I would understand is their body language unless I not understand their statue body movement…that is worse! Few those knew me so willing to let me read their lips so I have to do same thing with them. That is fair.

What do you think?

~DW

Is deaf school worth?

Wanna tell you this is not debate or argue about deaf school. I am looking over different students who went or not. There is opinion between deaf and mainstreamed school.

Let’s say here. I met lady that who has nephew went to deaf school and proud of him. We celebrated on his graduated there. When we talk about deaf school and I told her that I never went to any deaf schools. She look at me like “sorry” face, I felt so low because I never think of deaf school in my life. Also, I told her I have been faced with two worlds (Hearing and Deaf). She smiled. I felt better.

Okay, I should tell you that I have friends who went to deaf schools and knowledge about the event happens. I didn’t forget that. Few friends showed me and talked to me about how much they loved, how much they hated, or what they been done. I can see one subject is better chance. Why? They have communication accessibility and more social than family or hearing groups. I say their opinion, not mine. I can understand their family does not use communication accessibility and can not make good social in group. For example, Thanksgiving is WORSE for any deaf people because everyone chatted and left deaf OUT. *RAISE MY HAND*

Hey, deaf school study different but when they decided to go deaf university. They get better education than I ever seen myself. I admitted I wish can go to deaf university for better major but I did not. Will tell more about mine.

Well, I went to mainstreamed school all in my life. I had some deaf program classes there. Earlier of years, I went to both classes like hearing classes for READING and WRITING…deaf classes for MATH, ART, and SCIENCE. Then gone to University for couple years (bad years), anyway. I completed LOST in deaf class and kick me off back to back class to relearn. I got advance in class so took me to my age class for READING and WRITING then come back for basic class. When I moved to Texas and learned I am advance for deaf class so took me to hearing classes. In Jr high and High schools, I took both classes for better credits and plus learning from deaf friends who showed me their class what they learned. I was so shocked about that.

Hearing classes: SCIENCE, ALGBRA and ENGLISH but Deaf classes: BIOLGOY, and ENGLISH. Both varied by my prefer classes. Anyway, yes they have interpreter for all hearing classes because I have few deaf friends who in as mine. I have other friends in deaf classes too. So I have both view of their studies. In my senior year, my friend ran into me and show her English book for first time. My heart BROKEN in many pieces. She is also senior as me but that book killed me! I can’t believe how much deaf MISSED that. Okay, English book for 4th graders! I already have that in 4th grade! Deaf did not learn that till high school! I need breath…

Communication with hearing is hard but deaf is very easy to talk with. I know I been hanging with hearing friends and act one! Oops! I am wrong. 😉

Deaf universities in New York, Maryland (DC) and California. I never consider going there but wish I did. I went to Texas Women’s University and not finished. I left for job but took some classes in community college. I could have take courses online but nothing will be alike gone to deaf university, you know….

Well, That’s all, Folks!

~ DW

Miscommunication is big risk.

Today gone to grocery and move the cart to front of cashier. I had face mask and can not speak so loud. I signed to the cashier “perfect” and he think I said something wrong, he remove my cart away! I was like whoops? You know why…he and me are race different. See race different? My point is. Look at the picture.

That hand sign for….

Okay

Perfect

9 (nine)

Great

Friday

All that sign language miscommunication with people who use the WHITE POWER sign. Or can be ASSHOLE sign.

What about I LOVE YOU sign? Look at the picture.

I Love You

Those pictures would make you think ROCKS sign!!!! Yeah, I see that much! deaf people often misunderstands from them. One deaf guy that I know fistkiss the KISS band, he kept said they always say I LOVE YOU! I think he must be mental illness!

The sign language started in fifth century BC. The American Sign Language invented in 1814. There is lot of different sign language in the world started later in 1986. Universal sign language and baby signs becomes common like above pictures. EAT, DRINK, DRIVE, SLEEP and COLD or HOT. That is very common sign language for everyone among us. I raised with those signs, too.

Hope that helps little and can research more. link https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_sign_language

~ DW

Crippled?

Crippled is not what exact I looking for but had some to say here. As well it is Short and Sweet, too.

I wrote one called Staring is rude… Now it is crippled. I know it is rude to stare at crippled too.

One person stands in elevator and stare at deaf person from down to up and up to down. She thinks deaf is crippled. WHOA!!!! Deaf is not crippled.

Crippled is (of a person) unable to walk or move normally; disabled.

Deaf is lacking the power of hearing or having impaired hearing.

it sounds RUDE but fact, it happens to those people feeling and rid of disability. People never seen normal people has disability relate to deafness or any handicapped. Disability has skills like other people, too. That would not interrupted their lifestyle and their experiences by developing.

I can tell this as K.I.S.S (keep it short simple)

~ DW

Staring is rude….

Let’s say this short and sweet.

Flashback, when a kid stands and other kids stare at the kid. Oh I can tell how kid feels uncomfortable because other kids stares. Their parents told their kids, “Don’t stare at people is RUDE” I know it is hard to not stare much as we can. Sometimes have to stare at or can be drooling. Hehe.

Okay, now as adult stands and other people stare at adult. Sure, felt like shit, right?!? What do they think? Am I look like mental retard? Is my hair not straight? Is my makeup too much? Am I crazy? Many comments to say.

Jealously? No?

Here I come. “How rude you look at me real hard? How I look like? Dumb and Deaf?” I got this million times. I would slap the person out of my face. I not know why they look at me like body scanning, my eyes twinkling or my ear burns.

All I can say…Stare is RUDE.

~ DW

Less than perfect

Just watch of reruns from Fact of Life episodes, Less than perfect. I never think about hearing this part till explaining about her beauty and scar. I had remembered when I was toddler and model for display girl in small town. I been up and make few trips to meet events on runway with beauty pageants. After a couple year later, I had golf accident happened.

I never understand about being model as toddler but got the experience from modeling. As I am adult now, understanding the model is not easy thing. Hehe.

Okay, here is the story. I was only 5 years old and took me to family golf courses with friends. My childhood friend is only 4 years old himself. I was so active kid and want everything on my own because I am only child! Hehe. Anyway, my dad and his friend playing golf somewhere, I don’t know. My friend and I were with our mothers at one mound of golf course. I take my time to hit the ball, my mom refused let me go first so let him hit the ball. I walked to the hole and stand with my arms crossed my chest. My mom said “move away from the hole” so I did walk little back up near enough. I stand there and not see anything happens. I barely remember what I saw but explained to me after the happens. Poor little boy hit the ball but not know how much high he hit. He is on my left side and I am standing near to the hole. I turned my head to left and the ball hits my forehead! My left forehead starts hurt and bleed a lot. I stand like stubborn, yelled at my mom, “now I wanted to play golf!” She looked at me like child has bad attitude and stubborn. My mom kneels and told me, “you are bleed everywhere and can’t play golf!” I barely remembered because my forehead hurts more than my stubborn.

My dad found out about me being hit and injury so friends/family took me to ER to clean up bleed. Guess what ER doctor sew my left forehead up to about 7 stitches and suggestion do the cosmetic surgery on my forehead. I never think of it unless we are talking about it. My forehead acted up to warns me, “I am up here.” My scar never showed much and bump isn’t, too. My forehead scar always peace and reminder. My beauty is alive and enjoying the show. Everyone loves my looks, don’t know anything about my another scars over my body! Winks.

~ DW

Mental health without motivation

There is no motivation around me and would like have someone to motivation with me. It is hardest for me to handle with my parents and my own space. They offered me to stay on 2nd floor and all 3 rooms wall to wall limited from my space area. I can’t stand it at all. They had good space area on 1st floor.

Each time they are away from house and I come down. Had good peace and less of anxiety from up there. I could walk around and do errands there. Hiking, walking, skating or biking is good thing for me to go out and better motivation by myself. Up there is very limited and made me feel mental and anxiety.

My ring told me “keep going” and true to it because I am over 40s and also need get myself motivation. I am glad that I had kickball game league come up and working while the weeks. Exercises is on my mind and write much I can. Chat with friends are great but no one there. My parents are quietly people and not much to talk about. I have to pick up the subject then talk about it then stopped daily.

Have this mental health without motivation.

Love to chat with people, doing thing together, or exercising too.

~ DW

Historical in grandparents to kids

Look over the historical of the past in 1800s to 1900s year. All different of wars histories in the world. England, Germany, Russia, France and Japan. Where all honors history in different continents? Indians tribes? National cemeteries? We felt honored to cherish them in historical years. Now we had to destroy their honored historical like they are NOTHING to us. Our history ancestors are stuck in our life and looked over our family that was immigration and were fight that wars. Now we not have special war that we fight is gone. All we are fighting is racism, riot and hate crime. That historical is different then civil wars, North/South or WWII historical in 1800s and 1900s are gone.

Many great grandparents (ancestors) usually had words that kids not like because think all words are BAD word. We, adults used their words and we change to correct words for kids because it can be misunderstanding in through the years like N word or G word. Those words were nice word and always saying things nice but now it is removed. If look at old movies, black/white pictures and they will said those words often in good ways. Great grandparents (ancestors) not see it bad. Kids doesn’t like them because those words are hurts. Like all bible has original scripts in B.C. Yes, Hebrew or whatever language. Men does write different languages for us to understand in through years. All words changing to different meaning from scripts to theory. That is alike ideas with N words or G words meaning to them are different than great grandparents (ancestors) theory.

ASL (America Sign Language) was been corrections for many years, not only you or anyone on the earth. ASL always new to them. Original sign language from France 1800s and carrying around in different sign language. Indians does use the sign language because not know any languages when immigration comes in. The great grandparents (ancestors) use OLD sign language and many times, kids correction them for wrong signs. Yes, it is alike words bad or bible scripts changes.

I can understand where you angry but that facts. We are losing historical and our great grandparents (ancestors) are gone. We are into NEW historical and learning from it. Human Lives Matter!

~DW